Is Love without Passion possible? Is Passion without Love possible? Will that be called Lust? At some times, in our lives we find ourselves pondering over these intangible questions. These questions are hard to answer because the answers depends on one’s perception of these imperceptible human emotions like Love, Passion and Lust. I have always found it hard to draw a line which separates Love and Passion from each other. I have always considered that they co-exist together for a meaningful relationship or in other words, that they co-exist together in a relationship for it to have some meaning really.
However, I realized after reading this Triangular theory of love Wikipedia article that my notion of co-existence of Love and Passion was based on my perception of viewing Love as in from a romantic angle. If I were to define the wider definition of Love, I would say that Love has got three components – mental intimacy, physical intimacy and commitment.
Mental intimacy refers to closeness one feels in terms of being able to understand each other’s thought process or being able to predict each other’s behavior. Friendship could be said to be dominated by this component of Love. Physical intimacy means the attraction to the other person sexually or in other words, attraction driven by our desires. Infatuation could be described as a kind of love where this physical intimacy is the most dominating component. Commitment is perhaps the component, defining which I find it hardest to articulate. Commitment could be defined as the feeling which makes you think that you would willingly like to stick through thin and thick phases of the other person, support the other person during the bad times and rejoice in their success and celebrate it as your own during the good times. Usually, arranged marriages begin with commitment(forced by marriage) component of love and then progresses to achieve other components of love.
Based on the above described classification, I would consider a relationship driven by physical intimacy component as Lust if it is a mutual affair, or as Infatuation if it is a one-sided affair. And finally coming to Passion, I perceive it as a relationship where physical intimacy is dominating with mental intimacy hidden behind the perceptible layers.
Defining intrinsic human emotions intricately is not easy. And sometimes, it is in our best interests that we do not try to classify our feelings or emotions. Although, the classification is really fuzzy, our intellect will reason us to label our emotions which is often not required.
(PS: If you are really interested in Love and Shit, I would recommend you to read the Wikipedia article linked in this post.)
(The story of a blogger who was in his declining phase)
His friend asked him why is he not visible these days on the blogosphere. He made an excuse of work overload and hence, not getting enough time to update his blog. His friend might have bought that excuse but his heart definitely didn’t. He knew very well that blogging was not his part-time hobby but it was his passion. He had always proclaimed that one can always find time for something one really loves. He couldn’t decline it anymore that his passion for blogging was on decline.
He wondered why and when has that passion started declining – the passion which sometimes made him think a day or two about a topic/story and the etching feeling which made him wake up in the middle of night to blog about it so that he can sleep in peace. Recollecting those wonderful memories, his eyes glinted for a while. And at that moment, he also got a hint as to why his passion for blogging started declining.
He was a meticulous person by nature. He couldn’t help himself making a list of reasons he considered responsible for the decline. At the end of this activity, his list read as follows:
Initially, I blogged due to an urge to share my thoughts and ideas to be scrutinized/appreciated by a larger audience. The appreciation did follow. But now, I feel the urge to blog based on what the people would want to hear about and not based on what I wanted to tell them. I started blogging due to my passion for writing but later I felt that I was blogging to garner attention and popularity.
Going over your previous posts and admiring them is not a sin. However, I started questioning myself if I could really write a post of such quality again which would become popular like that previous post.
Going over other bloggers’ blog and comparing your blog to them is definitely a deadly sin which I committed. It was a kind of a feeling which a frog experiences when it comes out of it’s comfortable, dark, deep well for first time.
He read the list once again and tried to think if he has failed to include any other valid reasons. He was going through the list once again and then he suddenly realized something – something which amused him, something which was perhaps the main reason why his passion for blogging was on decline. He realized that the reason missing on the list was his desire to make sure that nothing is missing. His desire to be a perfectionist in his writing to an extent that he wanted his posts are ready to become ‘perfectly’ popular has hindered him to enjoy his writing like he used to do.
He tore the list apart and threw away the pieces to be carried away by winds of passion. He was now ready to decline.
(The character and the story are fictitious. However, it is possible that you may find this character to be symbolic of a real-life character and story symbolic to a real-life situation.)